Share and Care: Making Church Invitations Less Intimidating

Inviting someone to church can feel intimidating. As a Christian, you understand the importance and value of an encouraging and supportive community of faith, so naturally you want your friends to have that too.

But what does it take to invite someone into that community? What does it mean to invite someone to church?

In today’s increasingly secular culture, inviting someone to church can feel like a big deal. In recent years, the rise of culture wars together with the public failure of prominent church leaders has heightened an already skeptical general cultural attitude toward the church. Plus, it’s a big deal for someone to visit an unfamiliar community, especially if they’re unsure if there’s any common ground. All this can seem too hard, and we end up putting it off and never even offering an invitation.

So let’s take a moment to remember why it’s an important and effective way to introduce someone to Jesus. Inviting someone to church opens an intentional space for the Holy Spirit to show up and do His work in people’s hearts. It welcomes people into a community where they can explore and grow in faith, serve and take their place in the body of Christ. It's God's design for us to live in life-giving Christian community.

So how can we make this process a little easier, and a little less intimidating—not just for you, but for the person you're inviting to church? Here's some practical steps that can help.

1. Recognize that church can be intimidating

If you've been a Christian for a long time, church will feel familiar and safe. But for many people, it's a foreign concept, only influenced by what they've seen in media and entertainment.

Being mindful of the language you use is important. Rather than saying, “I'll pick you up at 7pm for the worship night”, start by explaining what a worship night is, and share details—like who will be there, what the space will look like, and what they should wear.

By avoiding “Christian-ese” lingo and giving as many details as you can, you can help your friend make a more informed decision. They are less likely to feel overwhelmed, afraid or resentful of the situation they're walking into. This leads us to point number two.

2. Start with something familiar

It's way easier to invite someone to grab a coffee, or go for a walk, than to invite them to church! Take Sam, whose quick decision may have saved the relationship:

“I got my haircut recently, and when I mentioned my belief in God, the hairdresser said he'd been exploring faith more lately... I got to share a little with him about my faith story and he seemed really interested. I invited him along to church and he seemed hesitant, and I felt the Holy Spirit prompt me to offer to grab a coffee with him before the service to help him feel more comfortable. He was really grateful for the offer and said he'd take me up on it.”

By meeting up in a neutral location, you can avoid the inevitable power imbalance that comes from inviting someone into an unfamiliar church environment that you are very familiar with.

Remember, there's no need to rush this process. Meet them where they're at, establish the relationship, then take the next step.

3. Invest time and energy

While it is up to the Holy Spirit to convict hearts and bring them to Jesus (1 Corinthians 3:6), we are responsible for sowing seeds of faith…and that requires investing time and energy!

Put simply, when you share Jesus, remember to care as well! Don't tell someone about Jesus and then leave them stranded. Take them on a journey. This might look like:

• Spending an evening each week to do Bible studies
• Sacrificing time with your social group to make someone feel welcome
• Adding someone to your prayer list and praying for them each day
• Sending a message or calling regularly to check in

Remember, if you're struggling to find time to care, you can always ask other Christians or people from your church to help you. Introduce them to your friends, and share the load (Galatians 6:2; Hebrews 10:24-25; Philippians 2:4).

4. Trust God with the outcome

If you take the risk and invite someone to church, remember: it's okay if they say no. Declining your offer doesn't mean that they've rejected you, or rejected God. Maybe they just need more time, or maybe they have baggage or biases that you're not aware of.

Rather than giving up or taking it personally, pray about it. Ask God to give you clarity, discernment and comfort, and continue to pray for that person.

The important thing is that you tried. You strengthened those faith muscles and will be better prepared and more confident the next time the Holy Spirit prompts you to invite someone to church.

Inviting someone to church is an exciting opportunity. If you have a friend on your heart that you want to invite to church, be intentional about making a plan, take courage and jump in and do it. Imagine what it will be like when they say yes! The reward far outweighs the cost. Ultimately, their journey of faith rests in God's hands. Your role is simply to offer the invitation.